A diagnosis is NOT a license to remain stuck in life. Especially in the area of mental health.
Many look to the deficit laden criteria of their diagnosis (e.g. ADHD) and use it as evidence they CAN’T do something.
This is a very disempowered way of viewing the diagnosis.
A more empowered way to see it is as a map of your skill gaps. Gaps that can be reduced in size with the right strategies.
A diagnosis shows you where your unique struggles are and where you need to focus your personal growth efforts.
You CAN increase your competence in areas where you now struggle. It may be harder than for most but so what?
Do the work because that process, that journey will provide opportunities beyond improving your abilities in say, focus, impulse control or organization.
You can also increase your capacity for self-compassion, patience, resilience and more.
You don’t get big biceps in a day, nor do you build the emotional muscle of resilience without walking the path to get you there.
Swallowing your pride is something you must be prepared to do if you’re committed to personal growth.
I spent most of yesterday at a hospital complex for a few medical tests.
Use of my walker was required for the first test and thank goodness for that. The distance between appts was further than I anticipated.
I felt how unsteady I was as I navigated the distance. A walk I likely couldn’t have made with a cane because of how much more difficult it is to balance.
Why had I been resisting the walker? Others have remarked to me what an easier time I appeared to have walking with it.
The villain was the negative conversation I had between my ears. “Walkers are for old people.”
That limiting belief (among others) has held me back.
Today, as I roamed the complex I saw plenty of people walking, using canes, wheelchairs etc.
Including people who looked my age.
It occurred to me in that moment that one reason I’ve resisted using the walker is because (in my mind), I couldn’t be invisible when I wanted to.
I’m part introvert and largely want to be left alone in public. When I do stand out I want it on my terms. Sound familiar?
Hard to do that with a walker.
In the complex I felt like I fit in more, like people weren’t watching me and judging me because there were so many more like me.
Right! Don’t care so much about what others think. I can do that, but only in the areas of my life I’ve made peace with.
Still working on the disabilities that often move faster than the speed of acceptance.
There’s a problem. I don’t want to live in a hospital complex. So how do I change my inner conversation to make me more at home with the walker?
I remember the others my age I saw throughout the day. The ones refuting the limiting belief that walkers are for old people.
The truth is, walkers are also for people like me. I can work with that.
How does this resonate with you?
What a difference a day makes. Yesterday afternoon an ice storm came through and my body responded with headache, nausea and pain.
I indulged in a lot of self-care (sleep mostly) and this morning I feel pretty darn good now that the storm has passed. Being a human barometer can be very trying.
I did my share of wishing I lived someplace else and cursing my body.
After while I dug deeper.
To a deeper place located in the neighborhood of acceptance and perseverance. The “just hang on, this won’t last forever” voice.
I will be mindful and treat myself with love until this passes. Practice that.
Do you remember when you were young, and an adult intervened when you were having an argument with a peer?
Invariably one of you would declare, “I’ll stop when he stops.” As though you were incapable of changing the course of your behavior unless someone else took the lead.
Now flash forward, imagine you still do this as an adult and trust me you do. It’s holding you back in ways you don’t realize. Please listen this to discover how this little habit sabotages you in a big way and what you can do about it.
I had a wonderful conversation with a colleague this morning who shared how he became pissed at me after a watching a few of my videos only to discover that what I shared challenged a few long held beliefs that were holding him back.
Listen as I explain how to go from being triggered to taking charge.
The fears that can hold us back the most are the hidden ones. Here’s a simple way to find them and turn them into something more useful.
Would you like a typed transcript of this episode? Click here to get it http://brianraymondking.com/mindset-academy/
Living with a diagnosis, any diagnosis, can feel like you’re trapped in a diagnostic straight jacket you can’t escape from.
To a large degree, your relationship to your diagnosis is the gremlin that makes moving forward and living fully seem out of reach.
But there’s a mindset that blows open the door to growth beyond your diagnosis. Listen as I explain this mindset to you.
Want a transcript of this episode? Click here http://brianraymondking.com/mindset-academy/