My disability taught me to ask for help ..

Recently when I was out to dinner with my family, I was trying to decide what to order. As a joke, I asked for a quarter to flip to make the choice easier. But when I went to flip the coin, my fingers just wouldn’t cooperate well enough to do it.

I have poor fine motor skills that make simple tasks tricky sometimes, especially later in the day when I’m more fatigued. If it had been morning, I probably could have flipped that coin easily. But not at that moment.

So I passed the quarter to my son, who graciously flipped it for me so I could make my decision. In the past, I would have gotten frustrated or resentful about needing even that small bit of help.

But I’m learning to accept it as just part of my situation. And I’m so grateful to have caring family who are happy to lend a hand when I need it.

It’s a win-win — they get to help someone they love, and I get relief from pushing myself to do what my body just can’t in that moment.

So if you ever feel ashamed or resentful about asking for help, even for small things, try to reframe it as a win-win. We all need support sometimes as part of living the human experience. Relying on loved ones allows them to support you and builds deeper connections.

Do the work to drop the shame and guilt. Learn to give and receive help freely and joyfully when you need it. That takes time and support I know. That’s why I provide it in my programs. We’re in this together!

How about trying it yourself this week?

Offer to help someone with a small task they struggle with as a gesture of love.

And if you need help, ask!
Let’s build each other up.
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