Raising teenagers is hard enough. I have the privilege of raising boys on the autism spectrum. Even if this doesn’t apply to you stay with me.
It’s difficult for my boys to consider ideas that aren’t their own. I hear ya, I too know many adults with this challenge who AREN’T on the autism spectrum.
Being stuck in your own head is like living life with a mental straightjacket. You want to break free but the more you struggle the tighter the jacket gets.
What’s the solution? Realize there is no jacket, other than the one you create.
Case in point. My 16-year-old overdoes it with the video games (DUH! What teenager doesn’t?) So I decided to establish a criterion requiring him to balance his video game play with personal development.
I started him with one of my favorites, Mindset by Carol Dweck.
He shared the revelation he read that it’s possible to see experiences as obstacles (fixed) or opportunities (growth). Of course you already know this, as do I. I’ve been explaining this to him and his brothers for years.
For some reason, it clicked when he began reading this book.
As much as you may fancy yourself the primary purveyor of wisdom for those you wish to influence. You may consider that desire as a form of limited thinking and a challenge with getting outside a bias toward your own thinking.
I’m guilty of this on occasion as well.
If you have a similar lust for learning and seek new ideas through books, podcasts, blog posts etc. It may make sharing your thoughts more effective if you direct your child, friend or colleague to the same source you discovered.
That third party validation is often more convincing than hearing it from you all the time. But don’t trust me, I’m just the messenger 😉
Listen to this post … Hoping our kids learn important lessons through lecture is a fruitless strategy. All your kid really gets better at is tuning you out. I’ve learned (especially with ND kids), introspection is a more powerful teacher. But ND kids tend to avoid introspection. Their self-consciousness and inner critic make it something they want to