My parenting was harmful and almost cost me my son – everything changed

My oldest son attempted Suicide twice and almost succeeded the first time. He spent a week in ICU.

He lives with ADHD, Asperger’s and dyslexia like I do.

As a parent I had to own my role in exacerbating an already difficult situation because of my own denial etc., about how he was struggling.

It isn’t easy for any parent to admit that the way they parent may have been harmful to their child in some way.

We make mistakes, we’re human. We must own this and be mindful of it.

I overestimated myself as someone highly regarded in the parenting space, I forget how being so close to the situation muddies your perspective.

It was like a wake up call where an elephant jumps on your head.

It’s taken a lot of work to heal things between my son and I, but things are great now.

One of the biggest changes I needed to make was allowing myself to hear when I was getting it wrong.

To allow my sons to tell me, so we could discuss it. Then I could adjust and grow when needed.

Another big change came from regularly talking to other parents about parenting.

Comparing notes, struggles and successes in this grand experiment of child rearing can be life changing.

You get so bound up by the confines of your own shoulds, anxieties, biases, patterns and such.

Having outside perspectives is essential for introducing you to new strategies your current way of seeing things won’t ever let you see on your own.

I work with a community of parents, many of whom have watched their relationships with their children transform from combative to cooperative.

We have each other’s backs and don’t judge one another for bad days. We support each other through them.

Now more than ever you as a parent need all the support you can get. I can provide it all remotely.

Shoot me a message to learn more.

How do you feel about change?

Listen to this post … One assumption many parents and professionals make is that people with Neurodiversity aren’t motivated to improve their lives. It isn’t that they don’t want to change, they may not believe they’re able to change. They often have difficulty finishing what they start or getting started at all. Struggle with creating

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Thoughts on setting boundaries and sticking to them

When learning to set boundaries it can feel uncomfortable to do. Like breaking in a pair of new shoes. You have to walk around in them for a while before they feel natural.You may even feel like you’re being mean to others you’re setting boundaries with. Especially because many of them will say so.It’s important

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Getting things done when you don’t know how long it’ll take

Listen to this post … One of the challenges with time blindness is when you have a long to do list. It can be anxiety inducing because estimating how long it’ll take you is a shot in the dark. I don’t feel time passing unless I have a clock or clouds to watch, something that tells

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Nipping IMPULSIVITY in the bud!

Listen to this post … Not thinking before blurting out an embarrassing comment. Doing things that upset others as a matter of habit, only to regret them later. The seeming inability to learn from any of this is a hallmark of ADHD. I used to get in so much trouble because of this. The reason for impulsivity

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When a neurodivergent person seems controlling, they may just feel unsafe

Listen to this post … Saying someone has, “control issues” is often a misnomer. For neurodivergent folks its often an issue with anxiety. Feeling confused in a fast, noisy world demands you find something you can hold onto. Something to help you feel safe. It can be a collection, a routine, a mantra, a person whose word you

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Movement can be help you work through your emotions

Listen to this post … One of the best reasons to include movement breaks into your schedule is because movement plays an important role in relieving stress. Feeling trapped is a hallmark of a traumatic experience or an anxiety attack. Feeling like you can’t fight or flee. An example might be a child who is having severe

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